Thursday, February 21, 2008


I'm definitely feeling a little better than I was on Monday. It was a huge shock hearing something might be wrong with my baby. It's one thing to be considered high-risk and to go through a lot of pain when it's ME that the problem is with. It's another when your baby is the one in trouble. It's a lot scarier.

I still know that the outcome of the amniocentesis is not a factor in considering whether to keep the baby or not. I know for a lot of women, having a baby with Down's would make them abort or adopt the baby out. I'm NOT one of them. So, you can quit looking at me with horror and asking, "Oh my god, what are you going to do!??" What do you mean, what am I going to do? lol That's a stupid question. It doesn't change the fact that I WANT this baby, more than anything. Dean and I FOUGHT to get pregnant; I'm certainly not going to be displeased with the results! lol

It's still hard not knowing the results of the test, though. This is going to be the toughest 2 weeks of my life, I think. Emotionally, I'm not taking it as hard. But, I'm not the type of person to be patient. I'm used to getting answers immediately. If someone else doesn't know, I find out myself. This is hard not having a choice but to wait. I guess I just need distractions at the moment. lol