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Wednesday, October 21, 2009

Girlfriends and stuff

Dalton: Mommy, do you have a girlfriend?

Me: Well, I have lots of friends. Some are boys and some are girls.

Dalton: Oh, do you kiss them all???

Me: Wha?? Baby, you can have lots of friends, but that doesn't mean you kiss them.

Dalton: Well, isn't that what you're supposed to do when you have a girlfriend?

Me: Not until you're grown-up. (Thinking: over my dead body..more until you're like..ohh..40)

Dalton: Oh...well...Is Dean your girlfriend?

Me: What? Dean's not a girl.

Dalton: Oh yeah, cuz he's a boy. Is he your boyfriend?

Me: He's my husband. We're married. Why do you ask?

Dalton: I had to make sure. You have to be married to get babies.

Me: WHAAA????? You're right, but where did you hear that?

Dalton: My friends at school told me. Then we went on the playground and we beat up bad guys.

Me: Oh ok.


Yeah, ok, shoot me..I chickened out of making that into a more meaningful, educational conversation. And yes, I mildly panicked when he brought up babies, and yes I was extremely relieved when he changed the subject.

Kids...they blindside you with the weirdest stuff sometimes.

Tuesday, September 22, 2009

Quick Update!

Well, kindergarten seems to be going pretty well for my baby. :-) Is started out pretty rough. He got the first red mark of the semester, out of ALL the grades. lol Then a couple of yellow marks, interspersed with green marks. Then another red mark for hitting a kid in the face with his lunchbox! 2 parent-teacher conference in 3 weeks was pretty rough. lol Now that I think he gets the idea that he's supposed to BEHAVE like he does at home, we shouldn't be seeing many more reds. I'm not being idealic. I know that NO 5 year old goes the whole year without getting into some kind of trouble, but hopefully, he's not getting them for hitting other kids anymore! lol

My little one has ANOTHER ear infection, so now we have a referral to an ENT to get tubes in his ears. We've been trying to get tubes for months now, but the original ENT we were referred to wouldn't do the tubes when he had a current infection, because he gets ridiculously high fevers. We found one through his pediatrician that will do it as long as we can get his fever under control. Other than that, he's doing great! His weight has evened out quite a bit. I mean, he wasn't all that big when he was born (7lbs 12oz), but he was 12lbs, by 1 month, almost 20 lbs by 5 months...a big kid! lol He's been at his current weight (23 lbs 7 oz) for the last 6 months, and is getting leaner in terms of losing the baby fat. He still has those adorable chubby baby legs, but he doesn't look so much like a butterball now! lol

See...I told you that was quick!

Tuesday, September 1, 2009

Kindergarten!

AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Ahem. So now that I have that out of my system, I'm doing ok.

We just got through the first week of Kindergarten and are starting on the 2nd. The first day of school for Dalton went a little better than I expected, although the people crying were kind of backwards. I expected to bawl my eyes out, but really didn't, while Dalton, whom I expected to be so wrapped up in everything going on, to be just fine....had a mini-meltdown once he realized mommy and daddy were actually leaving him there.

We walked out during the crying fit and stood outside watching as his teacher calmed him down and started him on a coloring project. And, oh boy, does that kid color angry! I mean, he was still completely upset at us leaving, and with his bottom lip still quivering and tears snaking their way down his cheeks, my child grabbed a crayon and proceeded to RIP into his paper with it. He was pressing so hard, and scribbling so fast, I expected the crayon to go flying and poke another child's eye out!

Can you image that call from the teacher? "Ma'am..your son has blinded a child with his angry coloring..." Yeah. As we watched, he seemed to calm down though, and off we went to the school library for a parent meet and greet. That was pretty nice to be able to meet some of the parents of the kids in Dalton's same class. I know that with a new school, he's going to make new friends, and he's now old enough to start the...duh duh duh...dreaded sleepovers!!! Which means that starting to build relationships with those other parents now, is definitely a good start.

His first day went well, and he got a green marks (green is good, yellow is "Behavior needs to improve", and red is "Stop the presses! Attend to your child before I lock him in a closet!"

The green marks didn't last long at all. On Wednesday, my child received the first red mark of the semester out of ALL the grades, K-5th. Wow, what an accomplishment *sarcasm.* Each child has a job to do each day. Dalton gets to turn the music on and off, another kid will pass out folders, another kid will hold the doors open when everyone's going to lunch or to recess, etc. Well, Dalton didn't want to give his name badge to the girl that collects it at the end of the day. When Mrs. L (his teacher) asked him to hand it over, he told her, "No it's mine. It has my name on it." When she explained that he needed to leave it at school and he could wear it again tomorrow, he had a meltdown and a temper tantrum. When she knelt beside him and told him that if his behavior continued, he would have to have a timeout during recess the next day. You want to know what my child, my angel, did? He looked at her, and said, "Too bad!"

O. M. G.!!!!!!!! MY child did that????? My calm, laid back, well-behaved child did THAT?? Holy crap. So, his daddy and I had a serious discussion with him, brought him to school early the next day and met with Mrs. L, told her how we handled it at home, and had Dalton apologize. She wrote us a note thanking us for being so involved with his behavioral issues. Apparently, parents nowadays would have left it alone. He still had to sit out at recess, which I approve of. Every action has consequences after all. Well, he behaved himself after that and got another green mark.

Well, on Friday, he managed to get himself a yellow mark. Not horrible or anything, but he was acting silly in class, so we had to talk to him again. We'll see how today goes! lol

And in OTHER news, I know that CLC schools are in the top ten in the country, and I'm THRILLED to have Dalton in the system there, but man, they start all this homework crap and project crap EARLY!

He came home with his first 2 project assignments on his first day of school! No big deal, but sheesh, I just got done buying school supplies, and now I have to turn around and buy project supplies...good lord.

AND he has his first fundraiser too! Anyone want to buy some over-priced cookie-dough??? lol He gets prizes for selling certain amounts, so I want to make sure he gets at least ONE!

Friday, August 21, 2009

This sums it up

Dear Diary,

Just moved to Texas ! Now this is a state that knows how to live!! Beautiful sunny days and warm balmy evenings. What a place! It is beautiful. I've finally found my home. I love it here.

June 14th:Really heating up. Got to 90 today. Not a problem. Live in an air-conditioned home, drive an air-conditioned car. What a pleasure to see the sun everyday like this. I'm turning into a sun worshipper.

June 30th: Had the backyard landscaped with western plants today. Lots of cactus and rocks. What a breeze to maintain. No more mowing the lawn. Another scorcher today, but I love it here.

July 10th: The temperature hasn't been below 100 all week. How do people get used to this kind of heat? At least, it's kind of windy though. But getting used to the heat is taking longer than I expected.

July 15th: Fell asleep by the community pool. (Got 3rd degree burns over 60% of my body). Missed 3 days of work. What a dumb thing to do. I learned my lesson though. Got to respect the ol' sun in a climate like this.

July 20th: I missed Lomita (my cat) sneaking into the car when I left this morning. By the time I got to the hot car at noon, Lomita had died and swollen up to the size of a shopping bag, then popped like a water balloon. The car now smells like Kibbles and Shits. I learned my lesson though.. No more pets in this heat. Good ol' Mr. Sun strikes again.

July 25th: The wind sucks. It feels like a giant freaking blow dryer!! And it's hot as hell. The home air-conditioner is on the fritz and the AC repairman charged $200 just to drive by and tell me he needed to order parts.

July 30th: Been sleeping outside on the patio for 3 nights now, $225,000 house and I can't even go inside. Lomita is the lucky one. Why did I ever come here?

Aug. 4th: It's 115 degrees. Finally got the air-conditioner fixed today. It cost $500 and gets the temperature down to 85. I hate this stupid state.

Aug. 8th: If another wise ass cracks, 'Hot enough for you today?' I'm going to strangle him. Damn heat. By the time I get to work, the radiator is boiling over, my clothes are soaking wet, and I smell like baked cat!!

Aug. 9th: Tried to run some errands after work. Wore shorts, and when I sat on the seats in the car, I thought my ass was on fire. My skin melted to the seat. I lost 2 layers of flesh and all the hair on the back of my legs and butt . . . Now my car smells like burnt hair, fried butt, and baked cat.

Aug 10th: The weather report might as well be a damn recording. Hot and sunny. Hot and sunny. Hot and sunny. It's been too hot to do shit for 2 damn months and the weatherman says it might really warm up next week. Doesn't it ever rain in this damn state? Water rationing will be next, so my $1700 worth of cactus will just dry up and blow over. Even the cactus can't live in this damn heat.

Aug. 14th: Welcome to HELL! Temperature got to 115 today. Cactus are dead. Forgot to crack the window and blew the damn windshield out of the car. The installer came to fix it and guess what he asked me??? "Hot enough for you today?"

Aug 15th: My sister had to spend $1,500 to bail me out of jail. Freaking Texas .What kind of a sick demented idiot would want to live here??

Will write later to let you know how the trial goes.

Saturday, August 15, 2009

My devil child

He is driving me INSANE!

Insane, I tell ya!

I have no idea how to keep up with this child. He is almost 15 months old, but he might as well be 3, or 5, or even 13. His rate of learning is just...incredible. I can't believe what this kid is catching onto!

He's still the king of temper tantrums. I only thought he had perfected it at 6 months...you know, kicking and screaming all over the floor. How much worse could it get?

Well, he showed me. Now, he's into hitting and throwing things. Let me tell you, that kid has an ARM! If he doesn't play baseball when he's older, then his talent is wasted.

Now, he's into doing things that I didn't think possible for his age:

  • Opening and closing the dishwasher, including moving the locking handle. AND he can use the turning switch to turn the damn thing on. Maybe I should just start teaching him how to load the damn thing.

  • Opening doors. Yes, I said opening doors. As in reaching up, turning the door knob, and opening the door. Yes, he's only 14 months old.....I know....My reaction too.

  • Using cell phones. Admittedly, he really doesn't know HOW to use it. But the kid has figured out how to UNLOCK my phone! Ughh. That was my failsafe to keep him from calling China! He could still get into my ICE contacts with it locked (just ask my mom and stepdad. they've received LOTS of calls from him), but now with him unlocking my phone, he has access to my full address book. And text messages. Sooooo...if you get some random call one day...it's not me! He's also figured out how to access the web on my phone. I'm scared to see my cell phone bill! lol

  • And for the grand finale.........you know those Safety First locking mechanisms that you put on doors and stove handles to keep kids from..oh, you know...turning the stove on?? Well, he can take them off. Yeah. I'm so glad that my knobs are on the top of my stove (on the back) instead of on the front, but the lady that watches the kids in the morning found out his talent first hand. He even BROKE one off her stove. It's PLASTIC for god's sake!!!

What, oh what, am I going to do with him!?

Saturday, August 1, 2009

PLEASE HELP!

PLEASE HELP!

My aunt is in the process of trying to adopt her grandson who was born a crack baby and at only 2 weeks old, he was in the hospital with a fractured skull and was recently diagnosed with a brain bleed. They are having trouble with the expenses of caring for him and need help! They could use formula, baby clothes, accessories such as swings and playmats, etc..If you can help, please ask me for details!

Hunter is SO small to be going through all of this. He is the cutest little baby, and is having so many problems already. He also has one of the worst cases of colick his doctors have ever seen, so he cries pretty much all day and all night.

You can also read about Hunter on my aunt's blog here. They could use any help you are able to give! Please let me know!

Tuesday, July 21, 2009

How To

HOW TO MAKE A PEANUT BUTTER AND JELLY SANDWICH:
(If you're 5 years old)


1.)Whine at your mom for 20 minutes until she gives up, finishes, drags herself out of a nice, warm shower all soaking wet and shivering, and pulls the bread down from the inconveniently high cabinet.
- Or you could just let mom finish her shower and drag a chair (on wheels...chairs on wheels are the best for this task) into the kitchen, climb up to the cabinet, and knock out every item on the shelves to get to the bread.


2.) Repeat the same process for the peanut butter. Let mom get all the way back into the shower and then complain that you wanted crunchy peanut butter...noooott the creamy kind.

3.) Ignore exaperated pleas from your mom to let her at least wash the damn shampoo out of her hair and demand a knife. Accept the plastic substitute, because there is no way in heck your mom is going to give you a real one. But complain loud, and very whiny, that you want a REAL one.

4.) Open the refrigerator so hard that the milk comes flying out and falls to the floor, popping the little plastic top off so that all the milk flows to the floor.

5.) Say just barely loud enough for your mom to hear, "Uh oh," and ignore her when she says from the bathroom, "What do you MEAN, uh oh???? What dd you do??? Did you break anything?"

6.) Leave milk on floor and cover it with a paper towel.

7.) Get jelly out of the refrigerator. Grape jelly only. Apple jelly is yucky. Your mom will eat it. Leave refrigerator door open.

8.) Stand on the chair (the one on wheels), and proceed to smear the peanut butter onto every surface in the kitchen. Bonus points if you can do it without leaving the chair. Don't forget to get it into the toaster.

9.) Repeat process with the jelly, but this time, make sure to get the jelly all over the burners on the stove so that it catches on fire the next time your mom turns it on. Think of it as a jelly surprise, or a jelly candle.

10.) Leave all ingredients on the counters...or floor.

11.) Sit in front of the TV and ignore your mom when she comes out of the bathroom, walks into the kitchen, and screams.

Thursday, July 16, 2009

An open letter...

Dear Ms. Cashier-at-the-gas-station-lady,

I have seen you in this gas station every single day...well, Monday through Friday anyways...for the last 6 months. You are not new. As per your bragging to another customer a few weeks ago, you have been doing your job for 2 years. So, why do you ACT like you're new??

Why do you have to call your manager to ask how to print a receipt out? You would think that all you have to do is print the "Receipt" button. It's on the register. I've seen it. I'm just sayin'. It's not that hard.

And another thing about that receipt. Sure, I may need to pump my gas before you give me a receipt, but there isn't any reason I can't tell you in advance that I'm going to need one. I did the whole gas station thing back in college. I know how it works. I know that you can't print a receipt for a purchase that happened prior to the most recent 3 purchases on that model of cash register. So, when I tell you I need one, when I'm done pumping and the thingy beeps at you, just print my receipt. Pretty please??? And no attitude. It makes you look like a fool. I'm just sayin.'

I could always start using the gas station across from you that has the fancy pumps that print your receipt right at the pump while you're still hanging the damn thing up. And the machines have yet to sprout annoying gum-chewing habits that sound like a cow chewing cud.

And machines sure don't hold up lines with incessant chatter to the customer at the register that just succeed in holding up the line. Want to know why? They don't talk. You don't need to say anything either other than "Have a nice day. Come again!" At 7:00 in the morning, I'm not much of a conversationalist anyways. I'm just sayin'. I really, really don't want to hear about the boil under your arm that you just got lanced, and not it keeps leaking pus, so you're going to go back to the doctor and make him clean it, and give you antibiotics, because your absolutely sure that you're going to get an infection and die, and then your husband would sue the crap out of the doctor, because obviously he doesn't know what he was doing, and he is way too young to be a doctor anyways. What's with all these young doctors today anyways? How is it possible for them to be legal? They're too young to have even just begun med school much less being ACTUAL doctors. Why, back in your day, all the good doctors were much older than you were....

You see where this is going? Yeah. Listening to that kind of stuff every morning is kind of annoying, so Ms. Cashier-at-the-gas-station-lady, can you just please, please, PLEASE just shut-UP??!!

Friday, July 10, 2009

Little piggy

My youngest, who is now almost 14 months old, is (obviously) growing and picking new things up on a daily basis. I sometimes refer to him at Satan's spawn (mainly because he has the most devilish personality and attitude sometimes occasionally all the time), but to me, he and his brother are my WORLD!

Even with him being impossible at times, he is cracking me up SO hard!

Case in point:

The other day, I noticed him shoving waffles down his gullet as fast as he could. Since I had not given him any waffles, I was kind of curious to how in the hell he got them. I watched him toddle over to the printer (Yes, the ACTUAL printer hooked up to the computer), flip the lid down, pull out waffles, and shove them in his mouth!

Yeah. Now, I've heard of kids hiding toys in just about anything (my brother even made the drawer under the stove his toy box), but hiding food???? In the printer???? He's special. That's all I have to say.

He's also FASCINATED with water! All kinds. He's a regular water baby. He even automatically starts kicking his legs and frogging his way in the pool when I hold him in the water on his stomach. But in the bathtub, he's thrilled with playing with the water as it comes out of the spout. A few days ago, he even started leaning down, turning his head, and drinking out of the spout. Like a dog. Yeah, he's special.

He's also an expert at playing peek-a-boo. It's the most adorable thing I've ever seen, but he has his own special version. This is how you play: Grab mommy's head with both your fists. Hold REALLY tight and dig in your fingernails. Now put your head on the side of her head (ear to ear). Now really fast, swing your head so that you are now forehead to forehead, and grin like crazy and drool on her.


He also like to play torture-my-brother. He thinks it's hilarious to eyeball my oldest while he's watching his favorite show, Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles, slowly walk or crawl to the TV while still watching him, and then jump in front of the TV and bang on it (often changing the channel) usually during an "exciting" moment in the show. Makes Dalton squeal and scream every time!

He also is a very crafty, sneaky child. He will walk or crawl to the door when I have it open smoking on the porch. I always tell him "No-no" when he tries to cross the threshold, and he is really good about stopping. He shoots me exasperated, dirty looks from time to time, but he does stop. Now, he will grab a toy (usually a ball) and try to chunk it out the door. His theory is if he throws something, I'll let him go outside to retrieve it. Every time, he will throw and then immediately go crawling after it. I've gotten really good at frisking him for toys and taking them away from him before he gets close to the door.

But NOW, he tries to fake you out. Seriously. He will take 1 ball and wave that all around to get your attention and then try to chunk it out the door. I grab it, turn and throw it back into the house, and he IMMEDIATELY takes the ball hidden in his other hand (See! I told you he's sneaky) and throw that out the door while you're occupied. If numerous people haven't seen this for themselves, then I would think it was a "one time" thing.


He is keeping me on my toes, for sure!

Thursday, July 9, 2009

One-track mind?

So, a while back I posted this about a chick I work with (who isn't with the company any longer.) Turns out she's...um...knocked up, and decided that she needed to make sure she would have enough money for when the baby arrived, so she quit.

Yeah.

That weird face you just made?

That was my reaction too. I'm not sure she's aware that she won't HAVE any money, if she's not working, but the link to that other post gives you an idea of how...odd...she is.

Anyways, I digress.

The whole reason for this post is because my stepdad texted me yesterday with, "I have been reading your blog. Please send pictures of the blow up doll. Your mom says ok. Honest."


Creepy, no?? Well, I thought it was hilarious, and if I HAD any pics, I'd share. Of course, I'd blur out the face and stuff so as not to embarrass her, but the whole point of that last post was to get across that the girl has no brain cells! It wasn't so much supposed to be about her looks, but apparently men have one-track minds. I thought it was interesting. lol And funny. So I had to share!

Friday, June 19, 2009

Blow-Up Doll?

Occasionally, I have come across someone who has defied the definition of "able," but until recently, I haven't met a person who I thought would have better been born as a blow-up doll.

Yes, you heard that correctly, a blow-up doll...with all the connotations that it brings to mind. You know the type, perfect body, gorgeous face, a wardrobe that barely covers the..ahem..ass(ets). Someone that makes Jessica Simpson look brilliant.

How can that be possible? As proof, the following are ACTUAL happenings, sayings, and doings by this one person.

  1. As they were leaving the office for a smoke break, Person A: "You should try the Camel Crush kind. I like them." Response from Ms. Blow Up Doll, "What are those? They're called Crush because they're as thin as a deck of cards, right?"
  2. As she was driving to an event our office was handling, she calls me saying she's lost...TWO hours after she left the office. It's maybe a 30 minute drive MAX to the event. Keep in mind, this event is EXTREMELY easy to get to. I ask if she's on I-10. EVERYONE in Houston knows where I-10 is (as far as I know Ms. Blow-Up Doll was born in Houston). It's the highway she needed to be on to get to her event in Channelview. She tells me, "I don't know where I-10 is!" O. M. G. Are you freakin' serious??? So, I ask her where she is..."I don't know." Uhhh...ok...what do you see around you? She says, "A park." For REAL??? You can't give me a street name?? Then she gives me the name of a business. Uhhh...m'kay. Nice to know, but in order for me to get you found again, I need a street name. So I get that info, find out she's on 225 (WAY off her mark of where she's SUPPOSED to be.) I narrow down to where she is on 225, and it turns out she's about 15 miles down in Deer Park. I ask her how she wound up all the way over there. Her answer, "Someone cut me off, and I wound up on an exit ramp." Soooo...you drove 15 miles down that wrong way that you knew was a wrong way? You didn't figure you should turn around at some point? Hmmmm.... At that point, I tell her to turn around and to take Beltway 8 N to get to I-10. That would put her out about 2 blocks from her event. Keep in mind, she had already passed the Beltway. She says, "What's the Beltway? Where is it?" Again, keep in mind, EVERYONE in Houston know what and where the damn Beltway is! It's a freaking circle around the whole damned city! She says, "I'm coming up on Sam Houston Tollway." I say, uh huh. That's the Beltway, hon. She says, "Ok, which way?" Ok, fair enough question. I say, "Take the Beltway NORTH." Keep in mind that there are signs that SAY north and south. She says, "Which way is that?" OMG. "Turn right. That would be the hand that has the backwards 'L' on it." She exhausts me.
  3. She has more wardrobe changes than a baby without a diaper. She comes into the office wearing a skirt that barely covers her butt. If I had her ass, I would wear it too, so I can't blame her. She pairs it with a blouse that barely covers her stomach and her boobs. I DO have her boobs..even bigger (and better, if I do say so myself), but even I would NEVER wear that to work! She also has a pair of ass-jacks that would leave me with nose-bleeds, and I wear 4 inch heels to work!! 20 minutes later, she goes into the bathroom and comes out wearing a completely different combination of teeny-tiny skirt, barely-there blouse, and high shoes. Uhhh...ok then. Whatever floats your boat. About an hour later, I notice she's now back in her original outfit. Come to find out later, that she had changed a couple of more times at the event she went to that day. And she wonders why she gets scummy guys staring at her all the time. Sheesh. We even had to have a meeting at work that yes, everyone is protected from sexual harrassment at work because of our policy, but if you wear certain types of clothes at an event, tradeshow, or roadshow, you can't complain when someone says something disgusting or offensive. What's soooo sad is that she didn't even realize that whole meeting was aimed at her. Everyone else did, though.

Trust me, there is SOOO much more about this chick that cracks me up, but I am already mentally exhausted just talking about her! It's going to have to wait for another "installment." We'll call them the "Ms. Blow-Up Doll Installments." There is enough fodder to keep you entertained for weeks!!

*********************************************************************************

IN OTHER NEWS, MY BABY IS WALKING!!!!!!!!!!!!! ALL BY HIMSELF!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Monday, June 8, 2009

*tsk, tsk*

I'm so lazy! Haven't posted in such a LONG time! Of course, I do have a real life that needs my attention more often that not, so I promise, I will TRY to be a better blogger! lol

...Like anyone reads what I write anyways! lol And for all my family out there that actually READ this blog, for God's sake would you just please break down and start your own blog??!! It's kind of awkward that you seem to know everything going on in my life, and can quote things my children have said, even though you live in different cities/states, but I apparently don't know anything about you! Can we say AWK-ward!!!

Anyways, I digress. I don't seem to have a whole lot to say...strangely...I make mental notes when something funny/cool/weird happens to blog about it later, but I always procrastinate TOO long and then I forget!

But here's what's been going on in my life lately:

  • My youngest turned 1..as in ONE year old! Can we say holy-FREAKIN-crap!

  • Dalton is a gigantic tattletale now..."Moooommmyyy! Ryan is touching me! Mooommmyy! Ryan is throwing his food on the floor! (As if I weren't sitting right in front of him!) Mooommmy! Ryan is following me!" I'm about to go insane! At least it hasn't progressed to the infamous line my sister used against my brother in a horrendously long car ride! "Alex is looking out my window!!!"

  • Ryan likes to play in the toilet...that Dalton just peed in. Eww.

  • Ryan tries to drink from the bathtub spout when we're giving him a bath. Funny, but still kind of eww...even though it's clean, I still don't get the warm and fuzzies about drinking anything from my bathroom! lol

  • Dalton will FINALLY get OFF the stairs in the swimming pool and "allow" us to hold him in the (slightly) deeper water. Major step for him.

  • Ryan has now had about a kabillion ear infections in the last 3 months. They're going to put tubes in his ears. Even though they do it all the time, I still get extremely nervous and weepy about the idea of putting my child under general anesthesia.

  • Dalton now knows how to lie...*sigh* As in, he was outside playing with my sister-in-law's kids with my mom on the porch. He asks her, "Grandma, can I pee outside?" My mom, trying not to laugh or be the "bad guy" says, "Well, I don't know. You'll have to ask your mommy." So, Dalton runs inside, and asks me, "Mommy, can I pee outside?" To which I reply, "ABSOLUTELY NOT! Go to the bathroom to pee!" So, what does Dalton do? My sneaky little child runs back outside with the door open, not 10 feet from me, where I can STILL hear him, and says, "Grandma, Mommy says ok, I can pee outside!" I immediately run outside to see my mom with her mouth hanging open, and my son with his willy in hand about to pee off the balcony! Do you have ANY idea how hard it was for me not to laugh when I was getting onto him???!!

  • Ryan will eat anything. As in ANY THING. As in, that child will eat the dirt on the ground if I let him!

  • I found out that taking 5 Benadryl at a time is kind of an interesting experience. I conked out at 7:30pm. I woke up at almost 9, hungry as a bear, wandered around the house for a few minutes still trying to figure out where the kitchen was, and why I was walking around, and went back to bed only to sleep the ENTIRE night...through my youngest throwing temper tantrums and everything at bed time.

Monday, May 25, 2009

Memorial Day Weekend

So, I have been procrastinating a bit on blogging about my weekend. It was SO busy, I need to relax for the rest of the week! Who can blame me!? My most favoritest cousin, Ashley, her daughter Athena, and my other cousin Jennifer came to visit from Little Rock. We had a blast!

We took the kids swimming Sunday morning before the thunderstorms started. Let me tell you, Ryan is a complete water baby! That kid took to the water, splashing, wading, playing with the ball, etc! He also thought it was hilarious when the other 2 kids would swim and kick their feet. Apparently, it's funny. I don't get it. lol

We also went bowling that afternoon. My butt and my thighs are a testament to how much fun we had! lol I don't think they could possibly be more sore! Other than that, we sat around playing guitar hero and teaching Athena and Dalton to play!

In NO particular order, some pics below, just so I can show off my adorable kids, and my adorable cousin Athena! Honestly, I just didn't want to straighten them out in order of occurence. See? I'm STILL being lazy!






Can't blame me for the blurriness in this one! See, I'm IN the picture; therefore, I cannot be taking the picture and be blamed for the horridness! lol








Yes, I know my..ahem...chest area was about to pop out. No, it's not just a bra. It's a shirt.









I LOVE this picture!!!



Ashley and Jennifer. Jennifer actually was wearing rainbow colored sneakers to match the bow in her hair. I wish I had her shoes. lol









Quit mumbling and grumbling. This wasn't out of laziness. No matter how hard I tried, I could NOT get the dang picture to turn over!!! It's even turned the right way under "My Pictures!"






Have to dig in the dirt!



Even girls can get dirty!
































Sunday, May 17, 2009

Pomp and Circumstance

My little man had his Pre-K graduation Friday night!

I just about bawled my eyes out! It was SOOOOOOOO cute!

They sang a few adorable songs..the one that goes, "If allll the raindrops were lemon drops and gum drops..." They also sang one about wearing black socks...it was really weird, but completely cute! They also sang another one that I completely forgot, because I was too busy taking video after video of it!

They gave flowers to their mommies, which DID make me cry a little, and then they walked to get their "diplomas."

As you can see from the pictures below, it was an AMAZING night, and I can proudly say that I am the mother of a kindergartner now...well in the fall anyways! lol


(Of course, my child was the only one picking his nose..sigh)























Monday, May 4, 2009

Professional Pics!!!!!





























Monday, April 27, 2009

Poor, poor, pitiful me...shoot me now.

I have the flu.

Or some ridiculous stomach bug that thinks it's the flu.

Or is so impressed by it's bigger, more annoying, brother that it feels the need to do everything that the other does.

Remember that whole, "I can do anything you can do better, I can do anything better than you. No you can't. Yes I can. No you can't. Yes, I can; Yes, I can; Yes, I can!!"

Yeeeaaahhhh.

You know I'm sick if I'm quoting obscure songs.


In other news, my almost-11 month old is WALKING!! Yep. He figured out how to stand up all by himself without any support yesterday. And withina couple of hours Dean and I had him walking (holding onto our hands, of course). Considering he figured out how to stand all by himself, and then walk within a couple of hours apart, I'm in trouble. lol. It won't be long now!

Saturday, April 25, 2009

Crashes and such

So, I spent part of the day at Memorial Hermann Hospital since my mom totaled her car by spinning across 4 lanes of traffic and slamming into a Beamer and a concrete abuttment.

I attempted to blog from my phone while I was there, but if you see below, apparently those didn't come across the way I INTENDED them too...at all. Ahem.

Anyways, she's ok. She hit her head pretty hard, but if she has a concussion, the doctors said it is slight since her pupils are equal and reactive. No indentions or swelling on her head either. But she does have a sprained neck and a sprained back, so she's not entirely happy right now.

Anytime someone has a head injury, or even a possible head injury, doctors do not give them narcotics for pain, since it can mask neurological symptoms of a worse injury than thought. About the strongest you're going to get is Naproxen...which they gave her. Which she's not happy about either.

But I'm just glad she's ok! I actually kind of felt worse for the poor little kid (about 7 years old, maybe younger) who was in there with a broken arm. The nurses were trying to get a sling on his arm, and the poor guy was sobbing his little heart out!

Anyways, back on topic, you can totally ignore the previous posts, because, well...they don't make sense! lol I would delete them, but it's kind of funny.

No?

Well maybe that's just me.

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Monday, April 20, 2009

According to Dalton, Ryan's new name is 'Fluffy.' Yeah. Like a cat. He's in the kitchen this moment calling Fluffy to him....like a cat.

Saturday, April 18, 2009

Updates...

  • My almost 11 month old has figured out how to get out of his crib. Yeah. As in, I heard a gigatic thump, a squeal, and hysterical bawling and rush in to his room to find him on the floor. Heart attack city.

  • Dalton now has a filthier mouth than a sailor. *Sigh* Can't figure out where he's getting it from. He calls everyone a smartass.

  • Dalton and his best friend Shayne have given each other nicknames. They vary from week to week, but Shayne is now Cheese Butt and Dalton is now Frank.

  • Ryan has now been moved into the "First Steps" class at daycare. Not because he's walking...even if he ALMOST is...but to make room for new, younger babies in the infant room. Also, he is a pretty aggressive baby (ie: throwing toys across the room, touching and climbing over other babies, etc), so he needs to be moved so he doesn't hurt the smaller babies. He's also doing more advanced things than the other babies that are the exact same age as him, so he gets a chance to learn things from the older babies in his new room.

  • Work is trying to kill me. I am now responsible for Houston, Austin, Tampa (and another location in FL), Grand Rapids, MI and Saginaw, MI as well as Portage, ME. Also, I added 2 more cities, Boston and Warwick, RI. Now, I'm going to be training an admin for Dallas next week. *sigh*

Wednesday, April 15, 2009

Potty mouth

My 5 year old comes up to me while I'm on the phone, and says.....wait for it......





"Mommy....The baby is in my fu**ing way!"


Thinking that SURELY I heard him wrong since I was on the phone, I said, "WHAT!!!???"


So, he obligingly said it again. The same.


He can't POSSIBLY have gotten it from me! Nope, no way! Well....maybe...if he listens to me when I'm in Houston traffic....then I'm sure he hears it a lot.


It's hard not to laugh, because it's kind of funny hearing it come from someone who has NO idea what it means. But, at the same time it's hard not to freak out and get irritated.......*sigh*



*Sigh*



A fine line for sure.

Monday, April 13, 2009

Class Clown


Need I say more????????

Sunday, April 12, 2009

Easter!
























































Saturday, April 4, 2009

Bob...er...Dalton...The Builder

His first birdhouse!!

The incredibly nice guy at Home Depot guy hooked him up with the apron and the REAL hardhat! For free! With just the phrase, "Oh, well if he's a Bob the Builder fan, we HAVE to hook him up!" He is SO proud of his creation!

I really, really tried to NOT use so many exclamation points up there, but I couldn't find a sentence that didn't really need one. lol







Friday, April 3, 2009

Ever seen a cyanotic baby??

Well, I have. It's pretty damn scary!

Turns out thaqt Ryan's new antiobiotic, Augmentin is tearing up his stomach.

As in explosive diarrhea. I can't believe I'm blogging about this, btw. I mean, who writes about the diarrhea that their kid has??!!

Apparently me.

Anways, back on topic...

Starting this morning, he shocked me by suddenly and with NO warning at ALL, opened his mouth and shot a fountain of throw-up across the room and on me! All OVER me..and the computer..and the floor...and on him. Which led to me using THREE towels to clean it all up with.

As if I wasn't running late already.

*sigh*

Once, I got him changed and myself into some clean clothes (although I wound up smelling like soured baby formula all day), I took him and Dalton to daycare.

On the way there, he puked AGAIN!!! A-freaking-GAIN!! ALLLLLLL over my car. Thank God that the Honda Element is designed to be hosed out!

I got that cleaned up with one of my sweaters.

*sigh* Which means I went all day at work freezing my ass of, because apparently Chad prefers to live in Arctic tempuratures.

In the middle of the day, I got a call from daycare that Ryan had puked 3 more times...all over everything and everyone. And that he had to be changed 3 times into different outfits because of the diarrhea.

Sooo...I had to go get him. They also told me that his lips kept turning blue and he was having a hard time breathing. Of course, they didn't tell me THAT until I got there!! If they had, I would have broken every freaking traffic law out there!

It's a scary and helpless feeling to watch your child vomiting so hard that he can't breathe and to watch his lips turn blue before your eyes!

It turns out that babies can get cyanotic very easy from vomiting, so unless his lips stay blue for an extended period of time, then it's not really a big deal.

But now we have ANOTHER doctor visit to make. If he can't even keep his food or antiobiotic DOWN, then he needs something else!

Poor kid..................

In other news, I myself wound up going to the doctor last night. I also have an ear infection. Ryan was first, then Dean, now me! I'm hoping that Dalton doesn't get it next!

Tuesday, March 31, 2009

Invasion of the yuckies

Ryan is sick....AGAIN.

No surprise, huh? You would think that he's permanently sick. He practically is. He's had so many ear infections, his doctor wants to put tubes in his ears.

*Sigh*

He's been on antibiotics for the last 7 days, and yesterday he shocked us by starting to run a fever...AGAIN. Come on! What kid runs a fever when he's ALREADY on antibiotics??!!

*Sigh*

Turns out that he STILL has an ear infection...even AFTER being on antibiotics for a week. Also, it turns out that he now has a DOUBLE ear infection. Which means the antibiotics aren't working.

So they put him on a stronger antibiotic called Augmentin. Now, I'm not sure how many people are actually familiar with that, but if you've ever had a kid on it, then you know that you're going to spend at least a week removing their diapers with kitchen tongs to avoid the diarrhea covering the lower half of their body, running down their legs and puddling on the floor underneath them. Forget wipes. You might as well just hold them under a running faucet in the bathtub.

Sound gross?? Trust me, it's even worse in person!

His doctor also said that if his fever won't go down within 48 hours of the new antibiotic, that something else is probably wrong with him.

*Sigh*

Friday, March 27, 2009

An incredible struggle...

Prayers for Stellan






I discovered this incredible blog through Ashley's blog. As I started reading about this incredible mother and the extremely tough time her littlest one is going through, I continued to be more and more amazed at the absolutely amazing strength and faith in God that she has.





If I ever had to go through this same situation with Dalton or Ryan, I think I would fall apart! I'm sure there are moments where she is not as calm and collected as she seems, but being able to keep it together enough to be strong for her other children has given me an incredible admiration for her as well as some insight into the wonderful relationship with God she must have.





To say the least, it's been an eye opener, and I appreciate my own family so much more faced with the realism of that I may be in her shoes one day. I hope not though.





Check out her blog, and please, please pray for her little guy, Stellan.